Touching Spirit Bear

During a TV show about bullying, one boy said that his life had changed–he had stopped being a bully, when he was required to read Touching Spirit Bear by Ben Mikaelsen. I HAD to read it.

Cole is a mean, angry 15-year-old bully. He beats another student so badly the boy is hospitalized withe severe, life-long injuries. No matter who talks to Cole or what they say, he is belligerent and argumentative. Not a shred of shame or remorse for his actions.

He’s given an alternative to jail which is banishment for a year to a remote, deserted Alaskan island. This decision is made when Cole becomes part of Circle Justice, a  program based on Native American principles that encourages change and healing as part of justice. Cole pretends to agree with the plan but in reality, he takes no responsibility for his actions. Instead, he blames his behaviors on his parents and others, never himself.

When Cole is left on the island, he has a small cabin for shelter and a year’s worth of supplies, with plans for regular visits from his temporary guardians. Within hours, he burns down the cabin and all his supplies. Later, he is severely mauled by a mysterious white bear. He is taken to hospital to heal from his extensive injuries, but is then returned to the island.

Slowly, Cole makes small shifts in his thinking. His setting forces him to learn new skills. Eventually, he develops self-awareness, thoughtfulness, sympathy, and remorse.

This is a powerful book. A child or adolescent could read it to themselves or a parent could read it to them.

Writing topics:

• Why do you think I had you read this book?
• Write about three things you learned from this book.
• How is the main character, Cole, similar and different to you?
• How would you describe Cole’s attitude at the end of the book? Of all the things he had to do to survive on the island, which one do you think contributed the most to his change in attitude?

Book info:
Touching Spirit Bear by Ben Mikaelsen. Ages 11-16. Especially appropriate for children struggling with issues of anger, aggression, abuse, and bullying. Also touches on themes of parental abuse and trauma.

Handling the mad

Feeling mad is a common emotion for children struggling with challenges in their lives. They may be angry because they aren’t getting their way, or because they’ve lost a loved one, or because they don’t fit in with the other kids. Mad often covers up other emotions such as scared, hurt, or lonely. But because mad is so noticeable, it’s often a good emotion to start with when helping children learn to manage their emotions.

I’m Mad, written for young children, works for all ages. The story is about a little girl that wakes up mad because the weather is bad and she and her dad can’t go to the park, a long-planned event. Her dad helps her think of different ways to accept her anger and deal with her mad. The book is written in a format where the child can pick the order to read the options for handling her anger.

The options include doing something physical, squishing play dough, talking about feelings, singing the un-mad song, asking others about their feelings, and planning something fun. The illustrations are black and white providing an opportunity for a child to color them in.

The book, I’m Mad, can be read to very young children, or older children can read it to themselves. It also works for older kids who may have low-level reading skills.

BOOK INFO: I’m Mad, written by Elizabeth Crary, 1992. Appropriate for ages 4-12.